

Shoulda Been a Cowboy by Lorelei James
Publisher: Samhain Publishing
Genre: Contemporary
Length: Full Length (234 pgs)
Other: BDSM, M/F, M/F/M, Ménage, Voyeurism
Rating: Best Book
Review by Gillyflower
The bigger they are, the harder they fall—in love.
Rough Riders, Book 7
Soldier Cameron McKay has found his niche, and it ain’t ropin’ steers and wearin’ spurs. His deputy sheriff job, plus battle injuries that ended his military career, keep him right where he wants to be: Off the ranch and away from his family’s pity. His darkest war memories are on lockdown, leaving him skeptical he’ll ever find a woman who wants a man who’s less than whole.
Domini Katzinski has had to control every aspect of her life since age eleven, when she was orphaned in the Ukraine. Watching others’ relationships crumble has convinced her to focus on the short-term and find a take-charge man to whom she can relinquish total sexual control. Cam fits the bill: gorgeous, with a brooding vulnerability no one else seems to see. Plus, he has his own handcuffs.
Once Cam gets over his surprise that sweet, shy Domini wants to be dominated, he is back to issuing orders. Their passion is as hot as a rocket-propelled grenade—and if Domini has her way, it’s a one-shot deal. Cam wants more, and launches a full-out sensual assault…until tragedy strikes, forcing him to change tactics as he tries to keep past demons from blowing their future together all to hell…
Warning: this book contains down and dirty games of good cop/bad cop, salty language, sweet ‘n hot lovin’, menage a trois, and hooah! a hero packin’ serious heat.
Oh my, do I love the way Lorelei James writes. One scene – a mere five-page prologue – and the whole conflict is established. You don’t have to have read the prior six books in the series (though if you haven’t, why haven’t you?). You don’t have to know anything about Domini or Cam or their childhoods or their history together, because you know who they are, as people, and as people who want each other and have wanted each other for some time.
One of the most enjoyable aspects of Ms. James’s books is that the people are real. Domini Katzinski is a young woman from the Ukraine who was forced to flee after the Chernobyl disaster. She’s totally insecure and thinks she’s defective; she’s soft-spoken but loyal. But while Domini may appear sweet and shy, inside she is a firecracker, and she is not afraid to stand up for her friends or to confront issues head on – even when the confrontation involves big, bad and sexy Cameron McKay. And those issues include not just getting him to show his interest in her, but also Cam’s own issues. Domini is not just strong, she’s strong for Cam. When he is embarrassed about his injuries or his nightmares, she doesn’t cuddle, suffocate or baby him. As Cam says, she has “guts”. While she offers Cam a soft place to land, she is no marshmallow. Her inner core is made of steel, and she is all about quiet strength.
Cam is the youngest McKay brother. He did not join the family ranching business. Cam was a career army guy until he lost his leg and his little finger in Afghanistan. He came back from the war wounded, and not just physically. Cam needs lots of space because he has never lived alone before – first he lived with his large family then in the barracks. He takes refuge is his home, and Ms. James’ description of both the place itself and his appreciation for the peace and solitude he finds there is lyrical. You feel like you are really there with him. And the way Cam interacts with his dog, Gracie, reveals so much of the sweet, gentle man he is often afraid to show the world, instead hiding behind his hardheaded, gruff persona.
Both Domini and Cam are scarred and scared; they are both attracted to each other in a fiery blaze of lust; and they are both afraid of a relationship. Domini doesn’t want a relationship because all the relationships she has ever seen have failed. But Domini is not so afraid that she doesn’t at least reach out to Cam. She knows he will be a take-charge kind of man, and wants that in a relationship. As she tells Cam, she has fantasized about finding a man who will take away her choice, who won’t let her be shy about any aspect of sex. “A man who will command me to please him and myself, but who won’t physically hurt me.”
And oh boy, did she ever find that man in Cam. His dominant side is his “real” sexual side. And Domini is surprised by how much she revels in giving over control, as well as how much Cam thrills to her doing so. Domini loves that it is she who can bring out Cam’s alpha side. A side about which Cam is so conflicted – he’s not sure he can be that man because he views himself as incomplete and inadequate, and he’s not sure Domini knows what she’s getting into it and can handle it.
The secondary characters in
Shoulda Been A Cowboy, if you can call them that, are delightful. Pretty much the whole McKay family puts in at least one appearance, as do many of their cousins, the Wests. The story is richer for this depth, and it is wonderful to catch up with what is happening with old friends. It also provides almost painterly context for Cam’s concerns and self-doubts. He spends so much time avoiding his family because he is embarrassed about his injuries, and Ms. James shows us how Cam could feel suffocated even if it is by their love and concern. Domini nails it when she finally tells him “Your inability to let your family see, just once, what the damn war did to you physically, makes you emotionally handicapped, and that is way worse than losing your damn leg.”
As always, the McKay women are fine, sassy, independent heroines. Keely is such a fun troublemaker, and her book, “All Jacked Up” can’t come out soon enough for me! The bar scene and ensuing bar brawl with the double-x side of the McKay clan is one of the funniest and yet emotionally honest scenes I have ever read. This is no syrupy women bonding. Interestingly, though you would not think so from their outward personas, Domini and Keely are quite similar underneath.
Ms. James also deftly addressed many tough contemporary issues in
Shoulda Been a Cowboy, without sacrificing one iota of the romance or heat. And there seems to be no taboo subject Ms. James fears to broach, including a multiracial ménage. War, disability, Chernobyl, police brutality in the Eastern Bloc, religious groups, nonconsensual medical procedures, spousal and child abuse, and the inadequacies of the foster care system, are all touched upon in some way, always thoughtfully, honestly, and perhaps most importantly, in ways integral to the story.
Shoulda Been A Cowboy is a long and deeply satisfying read. Every single word was needed to build such a richly told tale, with appealing main characters and lots of old friends, scorchingly hot love scenes, and a glorious romance between a couple that faces more obstacles than a military roadblock. If there was a category above Best Book, that’s where I would put
Shoulda Been A Cowboy. I cannot recommend it highly enough!